Red Dresses and Sad Songs

RED IS THE COLOR OF MY TRUE LOVE'S DRESS
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

Nivôse by Martha Romme
from her Calendar Series ~ Les Douze Mois de l’Année, 1919

Sometimes mistakenly translated as "Level"
but, in fact, that would be niveau;
this is Nivôse, an old French term for Winter:
"In Nivôse earth is sealed and usually covered with snow.
At this time earth is resting . . . "

Some years Valentine's Day is snowy,
and you need a red coat
to throw on over your red dress.

Marching On by Sebastian Bauer

For Valentine's Day, I have been saving up a few red - dress paintings and searching for poetry to match. Many songs and poems feature a red dress (as posted previously). However, nothing that I came across) felt quite right for today, so I settled on one of my favorite sad cowboy songs. After all, the word red is in the title. Furthermore, there are those who experience Valentine's Day as a doleful occasion, so perhaps the connection is fittingly forlorn:

Red River Valley

From this valley they say you are going
I will miss your bright eyes and sweet smile
For they say you are taking the sunshine
That has brightened our pathway awhile . . .

Come and sit by my side if you love me
Do not hasten to bid me adieu
But remember the Red River Valley
And the one that has loved you so true

Sung by Marty Robbins (1925 -1982)

I am also thinking that Henry David Thoreau's observation about the number of chairs in his house is equally appropriate to these three paintings:

". . . one for solitude [plus cats!]

Seen on The Cat Café
[still searching for title and artist]

. . . two for friendship

Young Girls Reading (aka The Two Sisters), 1889
by Pierre-Auguste Renoir (1841-1919)

. . . three for society."

The Three_Sisters, 1896
by Léon-Henri-Marie Frédéric (1856 – 1940) ♥♥♥ Happy Valentine's Day!

May it be filled with cats and sisters, books and fruit,
red coats and dresses, and a selection of sad songs!

Two recent favorites:
Wishing you A Perfect Day with No Hard Feelings

. . . and this old favorite that I always seem
to find myself humming around this time of year.
Next Fortnightly Post
Friday, February 28th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
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Sisters, Friends

"LOVE YA LIKE A SIS"
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

Painting by Claudia Tremblay

Reminds me of ~ Di, Kit, Peg

****************
"I remember standing at the wide white sink doing dishes
while the three girls braided their hair into a single fat rope.
Their conversation consisted of one of them telling the other
two to hold still, and then another one complaining the others
were pulling and would mess everything up. . . . our three girls
were firmly tethered together as one daughter" (36 - 37).

from Tom Lake ~ by Ann Patchett

[See also: FN, KL, QK]

This Fortnightly post will continue the theme of "Friends in Art" that I was having so much fun with last time! The various paintings have all come to my attention recently, but all of the literary passages below have appeared on previous blog posts -- at least a decade ago. So, it does not seem too soon to re-share these favorite thoughts on the depth and breadth of true friendship.

"And friendship had other charms to captivate my heart.
We could talk and laugh together
and exchange small acts of kindness.
We could join in the pleasure that books can give.
We could be grave or gay together.
If we sometimes disagreed, it was without spite,
as you might differ with yourself,
and the rare occasions of dispute
were the very spice to season our usual accord.
Each of us had something to learn from the others
and something to teach in return.
If any were away, we missed them with regret
and gladly welcomed them when they came home.
Such things as these are heartfelt tokens
of affection between friends.
They are signs to be read on the face and in the eyes,
spoken by the tongue and displayed in countless acts of kindness.
They can kindle a blaze to melt our hearts and weld them into one."

Augustine (354 - 430)
from Confessions, Book 8

"Companion or friend? I have come to believe that you can get along without anyone — that is, without the close contact of any one person. That is a terrible shock to me, but I think it is true. You do need companionship, but wherever you go, in whatever new environment, you will find people who, to a large degree, take the place of those you left. That is, you will find as many contacts, they will become as intimately a part of your life, as friends before.

"If you can get along without friends is it all gone after you leave a person? I don't think so, because when you see them again, or write to them, it all comes back. You can meet and talk with as much intensity and freedom as before, your connection is as strong even though the contact surface is not as great.

"Besides, I think that companionship is a static, objective thing. You can have it with anyone and it is relatively the same, while friendship is subjective and multicolored. There are as many different kinds of friendship (for me, at least) as there are friends. The intimate companionship goes, I think, when you leave a friend, but friendship stays. It is an inherent possibility of relationship that, once admitted — well, there it is."

Anne Morrow Lindbergh (1906 - 2001)
from Bring Me A Unicorn, 1972

Drei Winterthurerinnen, 1822
[Three Women from Winterthur, Switzerland]
by David Sulzer (1784 - 1864)

Old Friendship
Beautiful and rich is an old friendship,
Grateful to the touch as ancient ivory,
Smooth as aged wine, or sheen of tapestry
Where light has lingered, intimate and long.
Full of tears and warm is an old friendship
That asks no longer deeds of gallantry,
Or any deed at all - save that the friend shall be
Alive and breathing somewhere, like a song.

Eunice Tietjens (1884 - 1944)
from Leaves in Windy Weather

****************

"None of us are as young as we were.
So what? Friendship never ages."

W. H. Auden (1907 - 73)

****************

"There was a definite process by which
one made people into friends, and it involved
talking and listening to them for hours at a time."

Dame Rebecca West (1892 - 1983)

****************

"The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are wrong. Nearly anybody
will side with you when you are right."

Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
See my QK column: "Built-In Shit Detector"
[right-hand side-bar]

Need to send someone a birthday hug?
For me, this painting by Jennifer Yoswa says it all.

Next Fortnightly Post
Friday, February 14th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
www.kittislist.blogsppot.com

Friends in Art

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

The Tea Party
by Edward Cucuel (1875 - 1954)

“Friendship is certainly the finest balm
for the pangs of disappointed love.”

~ Jane Austen ~
Northanger Abbey
[Volume I, Chapter IV]

An essay in pictures . . .

Two Ladies on a Bench
by Edward Cucuel (1875 - 1954)

Borbee Plays the Flute, ca 1908
by Florence Kate Upton (1873 – 1922)

Two Girls In The Garden At Montmartre, 1895
by Pierre-Auguste Renoir (1841 – 1919)

The Bathers, 1925
Jose de Almada-Negreiros (1893 - 1970)

Two Women Throwing Flowers, 1872
by Mary Cassatt (1844 - 1926)

Two Women in a Boat
by Frederick Arthur Bridgman (1847 - 1928)

Two Women in Renaissance Dress, One Playing a Lute
by Frank Stone (1800 – 1859)

Two Young Women Seated, ca 1900
by William Henry Margetson (1861 - 1940)

“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Earlier Emerson Posts: QK ~ FN ~ KL
Enough excellent transcendental advice
to get you through the entire year!

Coming in two weeks: "Sisters, Friends"
Next Fortnightly Post
Tuesday, January 28th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
www.kittislist.blogsppot.com

Christmas Ideals

IDEALS MAGAZINE
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

1963
This is the much earlier "old - time" volume
that both the daughter and the mother (in the story below)
remembered and cherished, from back in the grandmother's day.

Between my mother and her mother (my beloved Grandma Rovilla Lindsey), they collected nearly every Christmas Ideals for 60 years. The oldest one I have from their early purchases is 1947 (Ideals began in 1944). When sorting through my mom's things, I kept all the older issues that my siblings and I recalled from our childhood. How we all loved the pre-Christmas ritual when Mom got them out for us to read. We would pour over the pictures, page after page, and imagine the perfect Christmas!
~ My Own Ideals Christmas ~
The later issues from the 1970s, 80s, and 90s I passed on to the public library sale, since, for me, they lacked the same charm and nostalgia of the earlier years. Before giving them away, however, I did take an afternoon to look through every page, including the letters to the editor.

Turning to the back page of the 1991 issue, I came across this multi - layered, multi - generational (grandmother - mother - daughter) meta anecdote. The mother's letter tells the whole story that happened a year earlier (Christmas 1990) about the daughter's sweet gesture to the mom in honor of the grandmother:

I have a Christmas story I would like to share with you.

"I have Christmas Ideals, Vol. 20, No. 6, November 1963. This issue has been on our coffee table with a candle and a Bible every year since.

"Our daughter came home a week before Christmas for a day. My 91 year old mother is ill and I had not decorated as much as usual and did not put our cherished Ideals on the table.

"My daughter noticed this but said nothing. Christmas morning I found a 1990 Christmas issue of Ideals. A note enclosed said, 'Mother, it did not seem like Chritmas with our Ideals not on the coffee table, is it lost? Here is a new one for you.'"

~ From Mrs. William T. Preston, Kenova, West Virginia

1990
This is the volume that the daughter bought
for her mother when the grandmother was sick,
the year the mom wrote the letter.

1991
This is the volume containing Mrs. Preston's letter
in the Readers' Forum, p. 80

I knew then that I could never part with 1990 and 1991. As you can guess, I shelved them right beside my vintage 1963, an issue which -- just like the daughter in the story -- I remember vividly from every childhood Christmas. From now on, these three magazines will always go together, a sentimental holiday triumvirate.

Another thing I love about the old issues is that my grandmother went through and marked all of her favorites with a tiny red penciled "X".

This one, for example:
At the End of the Year

I cannot let the old year die
Without a thought of you;
Without a wish for Christma joys,
And New Year blessing too. . . .

It is a time when friends and kin
Meet round a common board,
To share the love and fellowship
That happy days afford. . . .

And now my warmetst wishes go
To loved ones and to friends,
That peace and joy be in your hearts,
And love that never ends.

~ Agnes Davenport Bond ~

Also Thanksgiving Ideals

Next Fortnightly Post
Tuesday, January 14th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
www.kittislist.blogsppot.com

"the snowman brings the snow"

PADDINGTON & SNOWMAN
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

Way back in 1989, Gerry and I were Christmas shopping in Dublin, and the magical strains of "Walking In the Air" (from The Snowman) floated out onto the sidewalk as we were passing the open door of a music store. Gerry had been playing The Snowman score on the piano for the past few Christmases, but we didn't have the album. The tune sounded so beautiful on that wintry holiday afternoon, we just had to have it! Impulse buy! We turned into the store and asked about getting a copy of the CD that was playing on the outdoor speaker. The clerk informed us that it was not a Snowman soundtrack (currently out of stock); it was this anthology:

We purchased a copy that day, and every song on it has remained among our favorites for 35 years! We always start the season with It's Christmas!

This CD serves as the background music for all the treasured memories of my first British / Irish Christmas, when the following three songs came into my life. They are such boisterous tunes -- lighthearted, joyful and unforgettable -- unforgettable except that I am always getting them confused with one another, so here and now I am setting out the lyrics and vowing to keep them straight this Christmas and the next, and every other Christmas yet to come.

I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday
Song by Wizzard

When the snowman brings the snow
Well he just might like to know
He's put a great big smile on somebody's face
If you jump into your bed
Quickly cover up your head
Don't you lock the doors
You know that sweet Santa Claus is on the way

Well I wish it could be Christmas everyday
When the kids start singing and the band begins to play
Oh I wish it could be Christmas everyday
Let the bells ring out for Christmas

When we're skating in the park
If the storm cloud paints it dark
Then your rosy cheeks gonna light my merry way
Now the frosticles appear
And they've frozen up my beard
So we'll lie by the fire till the sleep simply melts them all away

Well I wish it could be Christmas everyday
When the kids start singing and the band begins to play
Oh I wish it could be Christmas everyday
So let the bells ring out for Christmas

When the snowman brings the snow
Well he just might like to know
He's put a great big smile on somebody's face
So if Santa brings that sleigh
All along the milky way
I'll sign my name on the rooftop in the snow
Then he may decide to stay

Well I wish it could be Christmas everyday
When the kids start singing and the band begins to play
Oh I wish it could be Christmas everyday
So let the bells ring out for Christmas

OK you lot take it

[Chorus, sung by children:]
Well I wish it could be Christmas everyday
When the kids start singing and the band begins to play
Oh I wish it could be Christmas everyday
Let the bells ring out for Christmas

Why don't you give your love for Christmas?

Written by Roy Wood

Merry Xmas Everybody
Song by Slade

Are you hanging up your stocking on your wall?
It's the time that every Santa has a ball
Does he ride a red-nosed reindeer
Does a ton-up on his sleigh?
Do the fairies keep him sober for a day?

So, here it is Merry Christmas,
everybody's having fun
Look to the future now,
it's only just begun

Are you waiting for the family to arrive?
Are you sure you've got the room to spare inside?
Does your granny always tell ya (ah-ah-ah)
That the old songs are the best (ah-ah-ah)
When she's up and rock 'n' rolling with the rest?

So, here it is Merry Christmas,
everybody's having fun
Look to the future now,
it's only just begun
What will your daddy do
when he sees your mama kissing Santa Claus
Ah-ahh

Are you hanging up your stocking on your wall?
Are you hoping that the snow will start to fall?
Do you ride on down the hillside (ah-ah)
In a buggy you have made? (Ah-ah)
When you land upon your head
then you've been slayed . . .

So, here it is Merry Christmas,
everybody's having fun (It's Christmas!)
Look to the future now,
it's only just begun

written by Neville Holder & James Lea

Merry Christmas Everyone
Song by Shakin’ Stevens

Snow is falling all around me
Children playing, having fun
It's the season, love and understanding
Merry Christmas everyone

Time for parties and celebration
People dancing all night long
Time for presents and exchanging kisses
Time for singing Christmas songs

We're gonna have a party tonight
I'm gonna find that girl
Underneath the mistletoe
We'll kiss by candlelight

Room is swaying, records playing
All the old songs we love to hear
All I wish that every day was Christmas
What a nice way to spend the year
Woo, yeah!
We're gonna have a party tonight
I'm gonna find that girl
Underneath the mistletoe
We'll kiss by candlelight
See upcoming pop shows
Get tickets for your favorite artists . . .

Snow is falling, all around me
Children playing, having fun
It's the season, love and understanding
Merry Christmas everyone
Merry Christmas everyone
Merry Christmas everyone

Written by Bob Heatlie

Next Fortnightly Post
Saturday, December 28th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
www.kittislist.blogsppot.com

Victoria on the Void

AUTUMNAL OWL
~ ACCUSTOMED, CEREMONIOUS ~

My friend Victoria recently suggested that
bleak November was a good time to re-read
one of our favorite poems by one of our favorite poets:

In a Dark Time

In a dark time, the eye begins to see,
I meet my shadow in the deepening shade;
I hear my echo in the echoing wood—
A lord of nature weeping to a tree.
I live between the heron and the wren,
Beasts of the hill and serpents of the den.

What’s madness but nobility of soul
At odds with circumstance? The day’s on fire!
I know the purity of pure despair,
My shadow pinned against a sweating wall.
That place among the rocks—is it a cave,
Or winding path? The edge is what I have.

A steady storm of correspondences!
A night flowing with birds, a ragged moon,
And in broad day the midnight come again!
A man goes far to find out what he is—
Death of the self in a long, tearless night,
All natural shapes blazing unnatural light.

Dark, dark my light, and darker my desire.
My soul, like some heat-maddened summer fly,
Keeps buzzing at the sill. Which I is I?
A fallen man, I climb out of my fear.
The mind enters itself, and God the mind,
And one is One, free in the tearing wind.

By Theodore Roethke (1908 – 1963)

We had been comparing visits to our local cemeteries. For me, it was the small sad Confederate Cemetery, just down the street from our house, where I love taking a walk. For Victoria, it was Lakewood Cemetery, "the most beautiful in the Twin Cities. There's a bench next to the small lake, and it's perfect for reflecting on purpose and passion, restlessness and recklessness, strength and fragility; feeling rather vapid in a disturbing vacuum. How do you fill The Void?"

How do I do it? Reading, writing, swimming, looking after the grandkids. I just have to a - void that spiral of "Now, why am I doing this?" Oh yeah, that's right, so that they too may grow up strong, thoughtful and contemplative, and one day feel -- and find a way to fill -- The Void. Sigh . . .

As ever, in a dark time, there are the inestimable insights of the great writers and thinkers. Like as we, Ralph Waldo Emerson also faced The Void:

"After thirty, we wake up sad every morning,
excepting perhaps five or six, until the day of our death.”
Isn't it somewhat ennobling, right, to think that Emerson felt the same way, so long ago? And not necessarily from depression or even aging, though perhaps coming of age -- whenever it happens -- might have something to do with it. Emerson mentions the existential sadness kicking in at age thirty, the true end of childhood.

How did Jonathan Swift do it?
"I never wake without finding life more
insignificant than it was the day before."
from his letter to Lord Bolingbroke

How did E. M. Forster do it?
“Two people pulling each other into Salvation
is the only theme I find worthwhile."
~ from his Commonplace Book

Or Robert Frost / Brad McLaughlin?
"We've looked and looked, but after all where are we?
Do we know any better where we are,
And how it stands between the night tonight
And a man with a smoky lantern chimney?
How different from the way it ever stood?"
~from his poem "The Star-splitter"

How does Alithea / Tilda Swinton do it?
"Despite all the whiz-bang, we remain bewildered."
~ from the movie ~
Three Thousand Years of Longing

Petrified Wood, Statuette & Owl (above)
all from my brother Dave's back yard.

Next Fortnightly Post
Saturday, December 14th
Between now and then, read

THE QUOTIDIAN KIT
my shorter, almost daily blog posts
www.dailykitticarriker.blogspot.com

Looking for a good book? Try
KITTI'S LIST
my running list of recent reading
www.kittislist.blogsppot.com